Anyone else really sick of the New Year’s self-improvement content? I personally don’t think the new year is a time for fresh resolve or locking in. At least in the northeast, it’s freezing. There’s no light. It’s a time for quiet burrowing and stripping down to the core. That being said, I am very prone to seasonal depression (or, as my psychiatrist sister says: Is it really seasonal depression if it lasts until July?). Though I don’t quite do New Year’s resolutions, I do find myself searching for a little something that will keep me afloat or add a little bit of brightness to this time of year. Last year, I did Mandy Lee’s 75-style challenge, a play on the 75 hard fitness challenge. The rules of the challenge are to get dressed every day for 75 days, document each outfit, and not buy anything new.
I hadn’t really thought a lot about my personal style before this challenge but I often felt like I didn't have anything to wear. I remember getting dressed in college or my early twenties often involved a group of girls asking each other “Do you like this? Do you like this?” until we came out in roughly the same outfit. (Bad writing workshops can function in sort of the same way but that’s a conversation for another time). I’ve always treated style as a sort of silly, superficial thing while my art practice gets more sacred attention.
I also had some hesitancy around personal style because I worried that if I committed to it, I'd have to find one box or shape that was "my style." My best friend Arielle has long said I have two alter egos, Gil and Lea (pronounced Lay-uh for some reason). Gil delivers magazines on his bike and Lea is a more indoor ethereal writer girl. It was funny how at the end of this challenge, I realized that most of my outfits are an expression of one of these characters or egos. The Gil outfits are masculine, loose, and easy to move in. The Lea outfits are more feminine and almost always involve a miniskirt. Most are some sort of mix of the two.
After doing this challenge, getting dressed has become a key part of my creative process. For me, developing a personal style is a process of looking inward—what do I like? What makes me feel good? It’s also a process of declaring my independence from micro-trends and constant passive consumption. It made me think a lot about other art forms I passively consume. (A big one for me is music. I’ve never felt like I have a personalized taste in music. I listen to whatever I’m served on Spotify. I think maybe I’ll do some sort of 75 music challenge this year...)
Okay, now onto the fun stuff. These were THE KEYEST outfits of the year that taught me a lot about my personal style.
First off, I never really noticed accessories until the challenge. Now, I wear the necklace pictured bottom right almost every day. It’s a great conversation starter, with people always asking if it’s a heart or a butterfly or a mussel. I also really like brooches (though wearing one made me realize that I don’t actually know how to say that word outloud).


I learned that I love mini skirts. That’s all.


My friend Meg (hi Meg) gave me this absolutely iconic rabbit fur jacket when we were leaving Salt Lake in different directions. She was moving to Arizona. I was moving to New York. (Side note: I’m reading Lonesome Dove right now, a sort of classic western novel. I’m also confused. But I picture us setting out on opposite trails, one to Arizona, another to New York. In reality, it was i-80 in different directions.) I didn’t wear the jacket for a while for fears of peta or something. Then, as usually happens with fears, I voiced it to a friend and they were like, ‘You didn’t buy it new... You didn’t even buy it at all. It’s an affront to the animals to NOT wear it.’ Not to get into a whole debate about wearing fur but I was like FUCK YEAH TRUE. So I wore it almost every day this fall and birthed some of my favorite outfits. The weirdest thing that did happen to me while wearing this jacket was that my two-year-old nephew pet the collar and said “Sunny” the name of my dog who is pictured in the corner of most of these outfit pics and happens to have the exact same fur.



A special feature is this jacket with the Paloma Wool bbl pants (If you know you know)
After the challenge, I started shopping a lot slower. I knew I wanted loafers so I researched them for many months and ended up deciding on GH Bass.


Also after the challenge, I got not one but two Rag & Bone pin striped baggy pants. (I fear they may be in bad financial straits because their stuff goes on sale 75% off six times per year. Or, maybe it’s just anything in their catalogue that includes the word “boyish” in the description doesn’t sell)



If you want to communicate that you’re gay, may I present you barrel leg jeans.


I’m excited to do the style challenge again this year and focus on formal wear because I really hate getting dressed for weddings and I fear I am in that season of my life. I didn’t ever get quite, um, good at photographing my outfits so that’s another goal for this year. If you do the style challenge, let me know how it goes?
something to read:
My short story out now with Split Lip Magazine! I think I’ll write another post about how strange it is to get a piece of fiction ready to be out in the world, how much longer of a process it is than I thought it was, and how horribly anxiety ridden it feels. I love fiction writing. It pushes me to grow and connects me with other people more than anything I’ve ever done. I’m really grateful to everyone I’ve been in workshop with and the editors at Split Lip for their work on it.

In terms of books, I read Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit by Jeanette Winterson (a lesbian classic that has been recommended to me one million times. It’s incredible.) I read Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry because it was described as an immersive page turner perfect for vacation (it’s a very masculine westerner and very long but I did finish it!). On audiobook, I listened to Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier (Published in 1938 and subtly horny, it’s the perfect audiobook for a winter walk.)
Thanks so much for reading! I hope you have a wonderful start to your year.
Love,
Zoe
I like Lonesome Dove because I think it’s as much about the inner lives of animals as the inner lives of men :) it’s an oyster it’s a butterfly!
yayyy congrats Zoe!!! Love the story <333